[lead]Share your values and expectations[/lead]
- Share your viewpoint about alcohol, both positive and negative in a factual way (not to scare them), and why you came to your position.
- Let them know your expectations and the consequences of not meeting them. Getting into lecturing mode can turn their ears off.
[lead]Foster and maintain open communication[/lead]
- As you share your viewpoint, allow your young adult the same opportunity. Listening does not mean you agree with or tolerate negative behavior. Arguing usually doesn’t help. Sometimes reflecting back to them what you hear them say can be helpful.
- Continuing to work on being better at listening will likely help them see they can come to you more and more.
- Let your young adult know that you want them to come to you if they or a friend are having trouble with alcohol or other drugs.
[lead]Learn about alcohol and other drug use and their effects[/lead]
- Research indicates that students grossly overestimate the alcohol and other drug use of their peers. This misperception often leads incoming students to increase their drinking behavior in order to reach this “perceived” norm. Also, some people think that drinking too much is harmless fun. Far from it, many students experience alcohol poisoning each year, and some die from it. NC State students are required to learn more about alcohol use and its effects through completing Alcohol-Wise. There is also a parent book list that may be helpful to you. Also, here are some talking points about opioids!
[lead]Support the healthy choices they are making or want to make[/lead]
- Focusing on what is going well can sometimes be more productive than what is not going well
[lead]Some questions you may want to ask:[/lead]
- How will you decide whether or not to drink?
- If you find yourself at a party where there is only alcohol to drink, what will you do?
- What will you do if your roommate drinks and/or if your room becomes a center for this type of activity?
- What will you do if you find a student passed out in the bathroom and/or how would you handle caring for someone who is very drunk?
[lead]Support is here, none of us can do this alone.[/lead]
- Feel free to contact us (prevention-services@ncsu.edu) for guidance.
- Go to a therapist, or try out a few Al-Anon meetings to talk with others going through similar issues.